I am particular about my notebooks and my pens. For over a decade I’ve written in Moleskine cashier journals. I write in the large, lined.

I think I would go bananas if I didn’t have narrow rule to guide me.

And for over a decade I’ve written with black fine point Pentel R.S.V.P. pens. They are cheap and sometimes a little bleedy, but also sturdy with a pleasing finger grip. I usually order two or three boxes from Amazon because I’ve yet to see my pen of choice in Kuwait.

A year ago I ordered a box of blue too.

And a couple of days ago, I wrote in blue ink for the first time since I cannot remember when. I was immediately reminded of some college journals I kept, so maybe then.

Writing in blue ink was weird. My entry looked washed out. The words traveling my arm to hand to pen came out looking misplaced. Still my handwriting, still my pages and my thoughts, but the blue ink was mismatched.

And reminded me of those college journals.

Ech.

I tried again the next day. I didn’t like it any better. Blue ink is not the way I write when I sit with my notebook and thoughts. So after two days, I uncapped my black pen.

I bought the box of blue pens because I knew I’d written myself into a tight corner: only Moleskine and only black ink feels like my writing practice. I bought the box of blue pens thinking: take a risk, write in blue.

Take a risk! Write in blue!

The real risk would be to buy an unlined cheap spiral and a fat multi-color ink pen. Even then, I’d use the black up first. And cry my way through red, green and blue.